Thursday, November 10, 2016

"Answering Stephen Marks (Though Some Other Stuff Might Accidentally Sneak In)"

To Stephen Marks:  (Although feel free to peek in.)

First… which is really “Second.”  Wait, a brief comment about “First.”

In reference to a recent post, entitled “One Time I Helped And One Time I Didn’t”, Stephen Marks opened his comment with:

“I googled Bob Kettle out of curiosity, he works for a company that builds submarines in France.” 

Explanatory Comment:  I had written about helping Bob Kettle with his high school “Oral Composition” about submarines.  When receiving a “three out of a hundred” grade on his French exam, Bob Kettle had previously grouched, “What do I need French for?  I ain’t goin’ to France.”

Hence, Stephen Marks’s opening remark.

Embarrassing Confession:  On my first reading, I actually took Stephen Marks’s “Google” remark seriously.  It was only later I realized it was a joke.  I used to be in the comedy business.  I really ought to have been “quicker on the uptake.”  Yikes.  And a belated “Ha-ha.”


“Why are you up at four in the morning?”

Over the years, I wonder if others have pondered that same question, as all my posts display “4:00 A.M.” as the time they were submitted.  

Answer (unless this was also a “Joke Question”, in which case I missed that one as well, in which case, “Yikes” squared): 

At 4:00 A.M., I am generally asleep.  However, this blogging apparatus allows me to write posts ahead of time, scheduling them for some future date and at any time on that particular date I prefer.  I have selected 4:00 A.M. because that would be 7:00 A.M. in the East (Read: Toronto) and I want my latest offering available for early-rising Eastern readers (Read: Torontonians) to wake up to.

I am pleased to relieve you of this worrisome concern – “He gets up at four in the morning for us?” – freeing you to proceed to more troubling questions, like, “What’s to become of this wonderful country?”  As I am a little concerned about that.

Finally (Mr. Marks’s welcome comment offering a plethora of issues to respond to): 

“Were you on a show called ‘This Is The Law’? I enjoyed that show.  I think Paul Soles was on that one, can’t remember anybody else.  I just remember you being smart and funny on that show.  Others were just smart.  Soles was funny but you were both.”

For openers, let me say “Thank you.”  The more salient response:  That was my brother.  (Who was indeed smart on funny on This Is The Law.)  So “Thank you” again… but for him.

This Is The Law was a nationally televised Game Show on which, after viewing a filmed humorous vignette, four panelists (including my brother) had to determine which portrayed little known ordinance had been broken. 

This Is The Law ran for five seasons.  Though still popular, the show was abruptly cancelled, as the CBC executive explained it, “… to give somebody else a chance.” 

Proposed new Canadian Game Show:  How many typically “Canadian” elements are included in the previous narrative? 

Answer (and “Spoiler Alert”):  1) That a show like This Is The Law could reach the national airwaves at all.  2) That it could run successfully for five seasons.   And 3) That, while still extremely popular, it was summarily dropped from the schedule “… to give somebody else a chance.”       

Did you get all three answers?  Congratulations, you’re a winner.  If you failed to get any of them, you are probably a Canadian.  Not to worry.  There are worse things than being a dull and fair-minded nationality.  Hm.  Another negative recent-election allusion.  Is that possibly weighing heavily on my mind? 

Relevant Side-Note/Slash/Second Confession:  It is not that I have never taken credit rightly belonging to my brother.  (Before This Is The Law, my “Canadian famous” brother Hart and his then partner Lorne Michaels starred in a series of CBC comedy specials.) 

Once, I got a TV job, allowing the mistaken impression that I was him.  (“I was he” doesn’t sound right.)  It was a Canadian “charades” show, where they provided the participants with the answers.  The best acting was not the contestants “guessing the answers” from their teammates’ cleverly conceived clues.  It was the show’s producer appearing delighted when the “wrong Pomerantz” arrived at the studio.

I thank Stephen Marks for his comment.  I got so caught up responding to it, I almost forgot about the election. 

Uh-oh.  Here comes the avalanche.

When reason fails… Fill in the rest of it for yourself.  Wait, you don’t have to.  History will. 

Is there no accountability for hideously awful prognostication?

Three tears from the Red, White and Blue.

You asked for it you got it Toyota.

Sorry.  It’s hard to write, licking your wounds at the same time.


Pidge said...

Your timing, as usual, is impeccable! As a Torontonian who doesn't even get out of bed in the morning without my daily dose of Pomerania, I offer my gratitude.
May I also extend my condolences to you and your new countrymen on the recent 'troubles'.....after suffering through a very public humiliating few years with a rudderless, incompetent blowhard at the helm of just one city, you have no idea what havoc you are in for. And our idiot really did major damage mainly to himself!
You know we'd love to welcome you and your family back home anytime. Think it over quickly, before they close the borders and you have to get your exit visas in Casablanca.

Stephen Marks said...

Thank you for answering my questions Earl. I'm so sorry for confusing you with your brother Hart, my mistake. You've written so many wonderful television episodes that I've watched numerous times over you'd think I would have known better. However I stand by my comments regarding your brother, he was great on "This Is The Law". I thought I could work in a "it was a case of the pot calling the Bob Kettle black" joke in there but didn't work. Anyway, thanks again Earl, and thank you for making me laugh through the years.

FFS said...

Another Torontonian here who appreciates the 7:00 a.m. posting time. Sometimes I think your posting software has a hiccup and I'll read a post that is the same as a few weeks prior. Anybody else experience this or am I doing something wrong? Still in disbelief about your election, makes me think Harper wasn't such a douche after all.