Every harbored memory
is a sleeping bird packed away in a box.
Once it’s awakened – and the nature of that process is perplexingly unknown
to me – it starts tapping, demanding to be let out. There is ultimately no choice in the matter. How long can you put up with a bird tapping on
a box?
The following is the
tiniest of sparrows. But its “Liberation
Day” has apparently arrived.
If it’s 1967, I must be in London, where, in fact, I resided
for sixteen months, at the time when England swung like a pendulum did. (See:
Roger Miller for the more infectious “present tense” version.)
Right to the point.
There’s a girl in my bedroom, sitting beside me on the
bed. This is not as provocative as it
sounds. My accommodations, a Hampstead
bedsitting room, included no living room or kitchen-chair sitting alternatives.
The bedroom was all there was.
The bedroom came furnished with only a bed and a
dresser. And so, since nobody sits on top
of a dresser – except maybe a ventriloquist’s dummy – my narrow single bed was
it, our physiological placement thus selected by default more than ulteriorily-motivated
design.
Who was this girl?
A question that is neither rhetorical nor a dramatic
introduction to the other person in the story.
The fact is, I have no recollection who the girl was, or how we had
arrived at this bedsitting room rendezvous.
The mystery of memory is that it is delivered in various exposures of
clarity, not just between memories,
but within memories as well, as we
shall see in this example, some aspects envisioned perfectly, others remaining cataractically
out of focus.
She had brought me a gift, which she enthusiastically
presented. It was a magazine. But not just any magazine. She explained
with unbridled excitement that it was a copy of the first issue of Punch, a longstanding weekly British
humour and satire periodical, established in 1841.
I felt appropriately surprised (because I do not recall this
girl and I having any kind of relationship), honored and impressed. I immediately, though carefully, started leafing
through the pages.
I recall vividly a cartoon I discovered that made me laugh
as hard as I had ever laughed at any magazine-published cartoon before or since. A single panel, depicting a morose-looking circus
clown, in full costume and makeup, peering somberly through the open flap in
the Big Top tent, staring at the torrential rainfall that is clattering down
outside. Standing beside him is the chubby
ringmaster, who says to the clown – this being the caption of the cartoon –
“Fancy your chances of
making them roll in the aisles today, eh, Rollo?”
That’s what I remember.
Not the girl. Not the
circumstances that brought us together.
Only the cartoon. Which made me
laugh hysterically. Partly because it
was funny to me, but also, to a substantial extent, because the cartoon demonstrated
that somebody from 1841 could still elicit a laugh a hundred and
twenty-something years later, pointing to intimations of scriptorial immortality
closer to home.
I, again carefully, set down the magazine, and thanked her
for giving it to me. The conversation
proceeded. And then circled back.
“I don’t believe,” she announced, a suggestion of irritation
in her voice, “that you fully comprehend the value and import of what I have presented
to you.” Those were not her exact words,
but the tone, reflecting unmet expectations, is indisputably on the money.
I assured her that I was wholehearted grateful for the gift. But, apparently, my original reaction had
ignited a fuse.
“This is a First Edition of a classic and beloved magazine,
a literary icon, if you will. You do not
seem to sufficiently appreciate what that means.”
We went back and forth on this matter, me, proclaiming my
enthusiasm, she, even more passionately convinced of my deficiency thereof.
Finally – as only I can, alone with a girl on my bed in my bedsitting
room, a girl interested enough to present me with a treasured memento that I had
appreciated but not as much as she’d wanted
me to – I do what I invariably do, opt for truth over sweet talk, which is an easy choice, because I don't have any sweet talk.
“If you really think I don’t appreciate this as much as it
deserves to be appreciated,” I suggested, “then maybe you should take it back.”
I do not know what I expected would happen that day – though
I was certain the preceding proposal would put the kibosh on many of the more
fortuitous possibilities – and I don’t even recall who wound up with the
magazine, though I have a sense that it remained, albeit less happily than was
intended, in my hands.
My recollection is, I expected nothing from the situation.
Which, it turns out, is exactly was occurred.
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