Wednesday, March 4, 2009

"Uncle Grumpy Pleads His Case"

Come on, Nephew. One more post.

Cable news. Again?

They’re driving me nuts! What’s one post? You just did four posts on teaching in England during the Dark Ages. You can’t spare one post for something important?

If cable news is driving you crazy, don’t watch it.

“Pay not attention to that mole on your nose.” That’s no answer. You ignore something important, you wind up with half a nose.

Look, nobody takes cable news seriously…

They don’t? Then why do those shows’ hosts make millions of dollars? Does that make sense to you? “Nobody takes your seriously. Here’s six million bucks”?

The hosts are paid well because they draw an audience.

Doing what?

Commenting on the news.

How?

In an entertaining manner.

So it is news or entertainment?

It’s both.

It can’t be both.

But it is.

I know! That’s the problem! These people take the news – which doesn’t belong to them, it’s news – and they manipulate it for profit. And they’re shameless about doing it. That’s what got my dander up. Chris Matthews. Smart guy. Thinks fast. Knows his movies. They’re talking about the economy. Oh, that’s another thing. These guys do a show every day. They have to. That’s the deal. And every day, on “Matthews”, “Olbermann”, “Rachel”, they discuss the faltering economy. It’s like a guy taking his pulse every twelve seconds. Talking about the economy makes investors nervous. Which makes the economy falter even more! But the do it anyway, because…

That’s their job.

It's still hurting the economy. It’s the same thing with the president. “How’s the president doing?” How’s he doing now?” “How’s he doing now?” “How’s he doing now?” Back off a little. Let the man breathe!

The president and the economy are the "Big Stories." You can’t stop them from talking about them. And there’s no way they’re going to ignore the "Big Stories." It’s bad business.

Free speech and free enterprise. Our two most cherished values. But they’re being exploited. And it’s killing us.

Don’t. Watch.

You’re right. I shouldn’t. Lemme tell you how shameless they are. I’m watching “Hardball”. Some journalist reports that in a column, he called Treasury Secretary Geithner, “…the ‘Doogie Howser’ of the Treasury.” Suddenly, he’s embarrassed, so he says, “That may be a bit unfair…” Matthews interrupts, saying, “That’s what we like here.” Then he’s feeling a little exposed, so he adds, “Stay unfair. But close to the truth.” You hear what he’s telling him? “Stay unfair, but paint the ‘unfairness’ in a veneer of credibility.” That's how blatant it's become. They’re announcing their “Game Plan” on the air!

You ever listen to conservative commentary?

It’s all the same. Distortion for profit. It just hurts more when my guys do it.

What do you want them to do?

A much better job. Do shows that help me understand what’s going on. Not the gamesmanship, the actual problem. If that doesn’t excite them, say good-bye, and go off the air.

They’re not going to do that.

Then they will suffer the consequences.

Which are?

A blistering diatribe from me. Listen, kid. These guys are doing real damage. Someone has to hold them accountable. What do you say? Will you let me lambaste them on your blog?

Sorry, Unkie. It’s time to move on.

1 comment:

growingupartists said...

What, no comments? I can hardly believe the missed opportunity!! Uncle Grumpy, what's your poison? I'm pourin' a Bailey's and bubbles, okay, comfy?

Here's what I like about cable news, and I expect to be fully lambasted at Lorne Michael's next dinner party. Earl allows you to attend those, doesn't he? Well, stick up for me.

I like the personalities. Every one of them has appeal. Still not sure which side Lou Dobbs is on, but if he's providing balance to CNN, more power to him. I always go to CNN first, out of habit. Though lately, they've backed off on their high-tech graphics and so I find it less stimulating, but I digress.

MSNBC is where I always head next. Not even sure what their perspective is, but I can usually find the hard news I need, though I'm secretly hoping for more speeches from Obama. This girl CAN'T GET ENOUGH!!!

I also enjoy watching the markets on CNBC, not that I have a clue how to play them. Sent that particular gripe to the iReport just today, one of CNN's wise attempts to connect with the addicted to the internet community, count myself included.

Me and my incessant feedback, do you think it's making a difference? Anyway, I'm 35, yet no clue how to use the stock market. It's my own fault for being a slacker, sitting around waiting for someone to deliver the Video Class right to me. I only trust Yahoo! (hey, they've BEEN there for me).

But back to CNBC and what I look for there. It's going to sound ridiculous, and probably only add to your hatred of the world and my X-generation led logic. I look for the little green triangles.

That's right, it literally breaks my heart when the day ends on a down note. I'd rather the S&P and Nasdaq, and all those fancy lenders or borrowers get green triangles. Yup, I'm stupidly simple in my expectations, I'll admit it.

I could go on and on, but don't want to muss up Earl's comment space. He has my email if he needs help working down your now risen blood pressure. I'll keep watching the airfares though, in case Lorne's wife needs some young midwestern blood at one of her wine parties (love the good stuff!!!)