Tuesday, January 5, 2016

"I Am Happy To Present..."

There is a book that was recently published called Short Flights.  The book is an anthology of aphorisms contributed by various writers, edited by James Lough and Alex Stein.

My brother Hart was one of the invited contributors.  His definition of an aphorism:

“A joke that went to college.”

Which gives you a preview of what’s store.

Relinquishing this platform to my brother, I shall today offer a sampling of his aphorisms.

I think they’re terrific. 

You might see that as favoritism.

My response to that perception?

It is not favoritism if you’re good.

Okay, here we go.

Aphorisms

By Hart Pomerantz


Law school taught me to take two situations that are exactly the same and show how they’re different.


A president near the end of his second term resembles an old stripper who has removed all her clothes and still has twenty minutes left in her act.


Man’s need for answers far outweighs his need for truth.


Never trust a country whose army marches without bending its knees.


Should you be considered an original thinker if you discover a new method of stealing ideas?


It is unfortunate that no school teaches us how to fail properly.


In prehistoric times whenever there was thunder, religion soon followed.


He was a type A minus personality.


The less the difference between people the greater the animosity.


All professions invent their own jargon in order to charge you for the translation.



The rug must be held responsible for its fringe.