Tuesday, September 3, 2013

"Our Candianan Holiday - Part Seven - 'Police Calls'"

For me, a locale’s “Police Calls” report, chronicled in this case in the Michigan City News Dispatch, is the microcosmic mirror of that community.  Though lacking specific evidence, I imagine that the list and nature of Michianan wrongdoings would contrast starkly with those of, say, Chicago during the same time period, the Chicago version of “Police Calls” probably requiring an entire periodical of its own, with appropriate advertising for tazers, Mace (the eye-burning spray, not the medieval whacking device, though possibly both) and bazookas.

The following is a random sampling from a reading of the News Dispatch’s “Police Calls” column during the period of our stay.  There were more serious inclusions – driving without a license, and the arrest of a minor for “uncontrollable behavior” – but if the selected items were deemed serious enough to publish in the paper, it is clear that this community, at least, does not consider them to be trivial.

Okay, so here we go.  Entries from the Michigan City News Dispatch “Police Calls” reports – July 25th to August the 3rd, 2013.  In no particular order:

“A man visiting his ex-girlfriend at around 6:40P.M. at “La Tar”, her place of employment, reported that the woman’s current boyfriend arrived and used a baseball bat to dent the passenger-side rear quarter panel of his car as he was leaving the parking lot.”
“An unidentified male suspect came to the residence selling magazines.  The victims had cash sitting on the kitchen table, and when the suspect left, $37 of the money was gone.” 

(Observation:  “$37 dollars of the money was gone” suggests that there was a greater amount of money on the kitchen table and that the suspect only took a portion of it.  Did the guy only need $37 dollars?  Or is this a rare example of a criminal who is not particularly greedy?)  
 “Two copies of the {Porter County Edition of the} Times were stolen from the ‘Super Saver Store’ on E. Michiana Boulevard between 4 and 5 A.M.”

(Musing:  The thief stole two newspapers.  Was that so they could give one to a friend and, if apprehended, they could escape prosecution by claiming that the friend gave one to him, planting a “seed of doubt” in the jury, and leading to an acquittal?  I saw the exact same tactic used on Law & Order:  SVU.  And they got off!) 
"Someone threw a brick through the window of a residence in the 300 block of Tillotson Avenue."

(A brick.  Are you feeling a sense of nostalgia?)
There was no “Police Calls” report in the Monday paper, suggesting that, either the criminals take Sundays off, or the police do.  Or the “Police Calls” reporter does.  Or a combination of the three. 

(Note to Criminals:  If the second one is the case, this is your day!)
An earlier report indicated that a pit bull who had bitten a letter carrier had previously bitten a little girl.  The number of victims is significant, because if a dog bites two people, he is mandated to be destroyed. 

Four days later, there was a follow-up to this story in the paper.

“Upon further investigation, ‘Michigan City Animal Control’ has determined that there are two pitbulls at the same residence in the 100 block of Dunlop Street than have each bitten someone rather than one pitbull that has bitten two people.  It was originally believed that the same dog {who had bitten the letter carrier} recently bit a child, but ‘Animal Control’ determined that it was in fact a different dog.”

(And a relieved pitbull goes “Phew!”)
“Someone painted an obscene phrase on her vehicle and painted the letter ‘P’ on another vehicle in what appeared to be the beginning of an unfinished word.”

And finally…

“A resident of the 200 block of Pinetree Court reported that someone had kicked the basement door in but that nothing was missing from the residence.”

End of report.

End of vacation. 

I am back in the “grind.”

And I miss it already.


YEKIMI said...

I wonder if a criminal commits a crime in the area where you vacation if he could get away with it by running across the street into Michigan. The Indiana cop would have to have a warrant issued, have him arrested by Michigan police and then hope the crook doesn't fight extradition. Don't think many would bother with it unless it was some major crime, like murder or beating someone up so badly they landed in the hospital.

Ebony said...

or stealing a grand piano?