When I was a kid, before our family got television, there
was a nearby family that already had
television. So all the kids in the
neighborhood would gravitate to their house and watch television there.
In early March, California does not yet have spring. So since I love spring – and what non-skating
Canadian doesn’t – we gravitate to
nearby Arizona that already has it and
we catch an early spring there.
It’s what you do when you can’t wait for spring.
Two extra bonuses: I
get to visit my friend whom I have known since we were both six, and his
wonderful and hospitable family. And I get a jump, not just on spring,
but on my beloved baseball as well, attending a preseason contest at Los Angeles Angels (of Anaheim’s) Tempe
Diablo Stadium.
One of my friend’s grandchildren is now too teenagedly
sociable to hang out with old people.
Happily, however, their eleven year-old – whom I shall call “Professor
Baseball” for his PhD.-level knowledgability (plus his consummate skills as a player) remains available. The “Professor” knows from our earlier visits
that I appreciate all aspects of the game.
So when it is debated whether to arrive early to watch “Batting Practice”,
he immediately chimes, “I’m sure Earl
would want to go!”
The Professor was right.
The Result:
We arrive before eleven-thirty for a 1:05-scheduled ball game.
The Tempe temperature is already edging towards ninety
degrees. It appears Arizona may have
skipped spring altogether and proceeded directly to “How can people live in this place?”
Not waiting to settle into our seats, “Professor Baseball”
and his grandma disappear into a crowd gathered at the railing bordering right
field to assault the arriving players for their autographs. Since there is currently no action on the field
– and our third base-side seats are directly facing the sun – I join “Professor
Baseball” and his grandmatical guardian at the marginally less torrid
destination along the rail.
Where we awaited the ballplayers.
For over an hour.
Without water. Because
who knew we’d be awaiting the ballplayers for over an hour.
Not that there is nobody on the field. What we observe is a passing parade of “The (in some manner or other) Connected.”
Among whom are:
The factota. (The Latin plural for “factotum.”)
Which means lower echelon “helpers”, in various
capacities. I see older men, some of
them in full Angels regalia, heading intently
towards their posts for the execution of their duties – don’t ask me what those
duties are, I have no idea. But whatever
they are, judging from their focused demeanors, these elderly factota take them extremely seriously.
I see two autographed-baseball-clutching youngsters exiting
onto the field following unforgettable private audiences with the players, in
the company of “connected” older family members – invariably of the male
persuasion – all of them moving with the Heisenbergian awareness of being
watched (and unilaterally envied)…
By the “un-connected”
gathered behind the rail.
Including me.
Everyone on the field proceeds with an identifiable confidence,
generated by the reality that they’re on the field…
And we’re not.
Neither, by the way, are the players. Whose arrival we have now awaited in the
blistering sunshine for more than thirty minutes.
Did I mention there was no water?
My mind wanders to another
waiting experience nearly fifty years ago (Yikes!) when I was living in
London. I happened to be in Leicester
Square when I noticed wooden barricades being assembled in front of a large theater,
and I was informed that the Her Majesty The Queen would be shortly arriving to
attend a premier of a newly released movie.
Having never seen Her Majesty in person, I decided to join
the growing gallery, and wait for the Queen to show up.
I waited for twenty minutes.
And then I went home.
Standing in that sweltering sunshine, it occurred to me that
I had now awaited these malingering ballplayers longer than I had awaited the exalted
Queen of England.
But you don’t want to leave.
Fearing that the moment you do…
They’ll come filing onto the field, signing autographs for
everybody but you.
So you wait. Uncomplainingly, if you’re “Professor Baseball”,
less so if you’re older. From one of whose
mouths I heard the words, “This is tedious!”
Wait, could that possibly have been me?
(I reran the tape in my head, and it wasn’t.)
You start noticing things, waiting in one place for an
extended period of time, little details you might otherwise overlook. I took note of the “St. Patrick’s Day”
greenness of the stadium’s outfield grass, more remarkable in the Arizona
desert, where the nearby towering cacti look on going,
“How do they get
water!”
I watch cameramen scouring the rail-gathered assemblage,
stopping to film babies wearing oversized baseball caps and the more photogenic
of the children, avoiding anyone who might have seen Mickey Mantle in his heyday,
no matter how senescently adorable.
But as our wait expanded to over an hour, the thing I became
most acutely aware of, not right
away, but eventually?
I had been standing on gum.
Tomorrow: The wait continues.
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